Then why are you in a cage?

[mostlyajerk]

Assorted Threads.

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[viber]

Nah, no plans.

You want to come over?

[mostlyajerk]

I want you to get dressed, Cisquito. I'm taking you out.

[viber]

Oh okay. So wait

like a date?

[mostlyajerk]

I was more thinking going to a gay club together, call it what you like.

But I want to see you in your tightest jeans.

[viber]

A gay club? What are we going to do there?

Okay, what about shirts? I don't have any sort of 'yay gay' sort of shirts.

[mostlyajerk]

Dance a little, honey.

What do you imagine a 'yay gay' shirt would look like?

[viber]

If you think you can keep up with me :D

idk like rainbows or dudes kissing or like all that LGBTQ symbol stuff? I guess.

[mostlyajerk]

Oh, I'll try. Or watch some other unfortunate guy fail to keep up.

We can work on that kind of gay. For now, what shirts do you have that are just a bit too tight?

[viber]

You will dance with me though, right?

Why would I want to wear them tight? Dude, I'm not ripped like you, I got nothing good to show off.

[mostlyajerk]

Definitely planning on it. Unless you find a hotter option.

Trust me, Cisco, your body's plenty impressive. But if you're not down with that, do you have anything that cuts off at the arms?

[viber]

Nah, I doubt it. I don't really need to. Like you, I'm not looking either.

I got one of those but none of my shirts are that tight. Well, I got one v-neck but you can kind of see my nipples through it.

[mostlyajerk]

Oh, perfect. Go with that. Your nipples and your neck are your weak spots, easy access is much appreciated.

I don't suppose you own eyeliner?

[viber]

You know how to manipulate both to make me whine. I'd be more annoyed but it gets me off so eh

Nah, sorry. Why would I wear that anyway?

[mostlyajerk]

Because your eyes are amazing. If I looked like you, I probably couldn't help but draw more attention to them. You're gorgeous. I can see it, bit of eyeliner, hair out of your face, then it all gets messed up again when I kiss you properly.

[viber]

My eyes are just like eyeish, I never though I had to bring them out but hey, cool, didn't know I had nice eyes. Always good to know I'm rocking something. I usually just assume it's my hair people are digging.

So will you kiss me tonight? Do I get one of those?

[mostlyajerk]

Your hair, your ass, your stomach, your thighs, your lips, your hair, definitely, your smile, your nose, you're pretty much the whole package. I've no idea how you're single.

Kiss you?! In public?! Gasp.

[viber]

Cause I'm a total nerd. I tend to lose all swag when I start to talk. And I don't know. I guess I have a quality people don't dig? People like me, they just never seem to want to date me.

Hey, dude, you're dragging me to a gay club, I should get a kiss. Then some seriously kinky drunken sex. I'll pre-consent while sober so it won't be taking advantage.

[mostlyajerk]

People are idiots, on the whole. Sometimes I forget that. I get why people don't want to date me. You? Not so much.

You'll get a kiss. You'll get a kiss and me grinding against you on the dance-floor.

[viber]

I don't know, I think you're dateable. Even if you're a total dick sometimes. And dude. no one wants to hook up with the dork with the star wars sheets and the cap undies. I'm not exactly a date magnet.

Oh. Hot. I am so game for this.

[mostlyajerk]

You're cute. I've wrapped up here, I have to change and then we can meet up. Now I have to figure out what I'm going to wear.

Also, a lot of guys are nerds. You could find your perfect match!

[viber]

Wear something tight too! And where is this place? Is it going to be a long way? I guess I can't really drive so I'll have to bus it.

Nah, I'm good right now. Like I said, not looking to date.

[mostlyajerk]

Of course I'll wear something tight, my ass is my best attribute.

There is one not far from your place, actually. We can walk, I could pick you up.

Aw, poor nerds are missing out.

[viber]

You ass is hella fine but not your best attribute. One of the top ten though.

Cool, we can do that. I'm ready, just hanging out.

They'll live without me somehow. ALAS.

[mostlyajerk]

Now I want to hear what you think the actual order is. I think everyone else agreed that it's my ass. Trickster took a poll.

ALAS.

[viber]

He rigged the poll and everyone knows it. He does the same poll on everyone and every time, ass wins. He's an ass man and he totes uses like spam bots or messes with the results.

Also his followers recently voted you and him as couple of the year so what do the know?