Then why are you in a cage?

[mostlyajerk]

Assorted Threads.

Comments

[viber]

So thai and vegetarian. I'm on it!

Should I bring back a drink or something? Coke? 7-up? Mountain dew?

[mostlyajerk]

I usually just drink water. But I'm fine with some spice, in case you're wondering. Not full on heat, but normal Thai stuff.

This reminds me of you freaking out over bringing salad to work.

[viber]

Do you want a coffee? Jitters is like right there. And I got your stuff, the women that works there looked at me like I was so crazy because I went vegetarian. She thought I was sick.

I was hungry, I asked for food and you tried to give me leaves. What the fuck was that?

[mostlyajerk]

I always want coffee. And come on, Thai cuisine has great vegetarian dishes! You'll have to try some of mine.

There were croutons, it was good salad! I mean, it was for my lunch, it even had strawberries.

[viber]

Nope, I'm good. You have your stuff, I'll have mine.

Ew, God. All I wanted was like a candy bar and I got fruit. You're like the boring mom no one wants to have. I bet you eat carrot sticks and celery.

[mostlyajerk]

You're secretly five, aren't you?

I like carrot sticks, not going to lie. They have a nice crunch. Grow up, try a nice dip, you'll like them too. They're great with cheese dip.

[viber]

Nope, I just like non-rabbit food.

I won't, stop being gross and prepare for a non-lame dinner. I got you a coffee and a brownie. You know, normal people food.

[mostlyajerk]

I'll show you the wonders of healthy food one of these days. Combine it with bondage.

But coffee and brownie sounds perfect also.

[viber]

That sounds weird. You're going to what, tie me down and force feed me carrots?

They sound way better than salad.

[mostlyajerk]

Not let you come unless you finish some veggies. I don't know, I'll think about it. Give you some vitamins.

You've never had a really delicious salad before.

[viber]

The food I eat is plenty healthy, lay off and let me have fun.

Nope. Doesn't exist.

[mostlyajerk]

Did I just find your hard limit? I talked about tying you to a cross and your eyes just lit up, but veggies is a no go?

[viber]

Looks like it.

I thought the line would be that vibrating thing you put in me but who knew? Apparently it's veggies.

[mostlyajerk]

With how much you get off on prostate stimulation, I knew you'd love a vibe inside you.

[viber]

Dude, you made the joke already when I had it in me.

Stop ruining my superhero name :(

[mostlyajerk]

I wasn't even joking this time, man, that's just what it's called. Says so on the package.

[viber]

I know but I like my name, can we call it something else?

[mostlyajerk]

Vibrator? Hm. Plug, we can go with plug.

Either way, I knew you'd love that. No idea why you doubted me.

[viber]

It looked big and scary. Same reason I doubted that gag you wanted me to wear.

Both worked out pretty well.

Man, that was such a hot night.

[mostlyajerk]

Had to keep your neighbours from getting a live show.

I suppose if we're dating, I'll let you top some time.

[viber]

HEH! I have ideas!

I watched SO much bondage porn and studied. Took notes. I am so ready.

[mostlyajerk]

...what ideas?

You're worrying me.

[viber]

Okay nothing like those scary bondage contraptions or those terrifying things that look closer to pain than pleasure.

I just mean I've been learning how to tie rope, cool positions, what toys people use that won't cause horrific trauma. Some stuff on the internet is SO creepy.

[mostlyajerk]

That's actually kind of adorable.

Have you been practising for me or for someone else?

[viber]

For you, dumbass.

Who else would I practise for? I'm getting pretty good. It's been a bumpy ride. Tying myself to the bed was an awkward one. Calling Barry to untie me was worse but I'm totally on top of this.