"The first hit is free, that's how they get you." Axel flopped back down lazily and sprawled out, closing his eyes and wishing he was just less of a fuck up for once. "Before I started living by myself, I had this real shot at being with a normal family, you know? I just had to make sure I did everything right. I had to be perfect. That's all anyone ever told me. Be nice, be polite, do what you're told and they'll want you. And I did everything right, everything. And they still didn't want me."

Axel still didn't get it but then, he never got people. He felt like they were all working on a different level to him and no matter what he did, it was inevitable it'd go wrong. "Just to spite everyone, I went out and did everything wrong and you know what? I'm really good at that." Axel grinned with a faint bit of pride because yes, he was proud, What of it? "I'm good at being a trainwreck and if you don't want to date a trainwreck, that makes sense, I get that. It's easier. But what if I do all of this right and you still don't want me? I don't know if I could do that again."