Hartley shuddered just imagining that, although he didn't stop smirking either. "You know that I've never even called my father dad? It's either 'father' or his first name, so. I'd actually pay you to do that." Well. "I have roughly ten dollar to my name right now, but you could get two fifty." He needed some money to feed the rats, after all.

"You should just come in drag. I bet you could pull it off. You have the eyelashes for it."